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 Ann Coulter Reply


 December, 2007


 Ann Coulter - How To Un-Merry a Christmas

How to Un-Merry a Christmas

By Al Owens
It’s still the Christmas season. I know that’s a terribly obvious statement, but there are still people who didn’t seem to know that – even on Christmas morning.

The Fox News Channel claims it’s the central front on the war on the (supposed) “War on Christmas.” Yet, early on Christmas morning, Fox News proved it is a heap bit better at brow beating people into saying merry Christmas than they are at actually wishing people have one.

If you’re one of those gullible people who believe that there are dark forces newly arrayed around the country that are scheming to get people to forget whose birthday we celebrate on Christmas day, you may want to reach for your heart medicine before you finish this. You’re not going to like it, and I’m glad.

First, the supposed “War on Christmas” was invented by people (Bill O’Reilly and John Gibson of Fox News) who need to point out the world’s villains, in order to make us feel comfortable about feeling uncomfortable.

Watering down the true meaning of Christmas is really nothing new. If you consider that Jesus was the embodiment of the ultimate truth, for instance, then why would there be a need to invent another character that represents the ultimate lie?
I hate to break this to you, but nobody can truly climb down every chimney on earth in just one night.
Nor, can the true spirit of the holidays be gauged by the amount cash that has been spent on the day following Thanksgiving.
That’s why those people who’re enraged by the supposed sacrilegious deceit contained within the mere utterance of the phrase “happy holidays” – haven’t the foggiest idea of their irony of that rage when they hear a store clerk uttering it.

Personally, I’m not sure why the folks at Fox News decided they’d defend Christmas. On Christmas morning they seemed to be the last people on earth who were inclined to think about things like goodwill toward men, or children, or pregnant mothers or people too poor to pay their fuel bills.

They pointed out that Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez had announced he’s sending low cost fuel to Washington, D.C. to help those people who can’t afford the high cost to heat their homes.

He’s done that kind of thing before. He’s also been accused of playing politics with his oil when he did it.
So what? There are people all over Washington (not necessarily in the White House or in Congress) who are grateful that somebody will help them.
Earlier this month, Fox News’ Neil Cavuto showed he wasn’t exactly in the spirit of the season, by showing his disdain for the poor people of Washington and his rightwing credentials by claiming, “The guy is clearly doing this for P.R. purposes.”

So it’s for P.R. purposes? Well, why doesn’t Exxon-Mobile get into the P.R. business then?

Meanwhile, millions of gallons of low cost oil will flow in Massachusetts because of the Madison Avenue minded Chavez.

On Christmas morning, Fox News was so out of sorts by the offer of cheap oil, it ran a poll about it.
“Do you think we should accept oil from Hugo Chavez,” the poll asked. 77 percent of those responding said yes. That leaves 23 percent I’d like to meet in a dark alley. Or, 23 percent I’d really not like to sit next to on a cross country bus trip.

Who are those people, who’ve fallen into the trap that George Bush’s enemies are our enemies? Chavez doesn’t like Bush. He wouldn’t be sending tankers to Washington, New York City and Massachusetts if he really didn’t like the rest of the people of the United States.

But according to Fox News and 23 percent of those polled, Chavez is our enemy so we shouldn’t accept his good tidings. I’ll wager none of the people who’d refuse the cheap oil, would actually need it.

Petty politics has a way of slipping down on the to-do lists of people who’d like to stay warm in winter.

Chavez isn’t a nice guy. Yep, he’d do anything to embarrass the Bush administration. But cheap oil is cheap oil.

He started these programs back in 2005. He expanded them in 2006, with offers of low cost oil that affected 200,000 New Yorkers.

Back then, even some warm and toasty conservative legislators called on the governor of Maine to refuse the oil shipments.

Even televangelists, like Pat Robertson, bristle at the idea of the disadvantaged staying warm, when there’s a pitiable political point to be made.

When Chavez first made his first offer back in 2005, he also predicted that oil prices would reach $100 a barrel by the year 2012. He was off by five years, so I guess that’s why Robertson called for his assassination.

“If he thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it. It's a whole lot cheaper than starting a war,” Robertson spit out.

Later Robertson apologized. But I think, only because he hadn’t called for his assassination on Christmas Day.